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Tom Coburn is a Big Fat Jerk


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Monday, January 31, 2005

Complaining

I have a friend who, for as long as I've known her, has complained about everything. I suspect she easily ranks among world class complainers --- last night, for example, she caught me on the phone and started in on her litany of complaints and didn't stop for two and a half hours.

You read that right: two and a half hours.

See, I timed her. I hardly uttered a word the whole time and simply kept the phone tucked under my ear while I performed various chores (feeding the dogs, washing the dishes, talking to the plants in the plant room [don't ask], letting the dogs out, letting the dogs in, giving the dogs bananas [their favorite treat next to macadamia nuts and stalks of broccoli], dusting, sweeping, whatever).

Her complaints range from her inability to make new friends to how expensive everything it and how she can't afford any of it and how she wishes she lives in the country [note if you will the rural areas she wants to live in are among the most expensive in the country] and what is wrong with her skin and she asked someone to go to a movie and they forgot and how could they do that to her how could they do that to her and besides their dog! god what a horrible dog they need to get that dog a new home and her cat isn't coming home to eat every day and that means he isn't eating so he's going to die [I suggested that perhaps her cat is like all the cats I've known and has found several places to feed him, a suggestion which met with the most horrific of screams NO MY CAT DOESN'T LIKE ANYBODY BUT ME YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND I FEED HIM AND HE ONLY EATS A LITTLE BUT THEN GOES TO SLEEP AND THEN HE DISAPPEARS FOR THREE DAYS AT A TIME AND I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIM BECAUSE HE'S STARVING TO DEATH to which I respond is he losing weight/ NO HE'S GETTING FAT I'M SURE HE'S GOT A TUMOR OR SOME DISEASE THAT'S MAKING HIM BLOAT UP BUT HE EVER COMES AROUND ANYMORE SO I CAN'T CATCH HIM TO TAKE HIM TO THE VET ... ) ...

I mean, what do you do with people like this? I once cut her off for two years because I just couldn't take it anymore.

The problem is, I'm her only friend and I feel really badly for her. But her thinking is so strange.

Worse, she spends a lot of time getting into my business. DON'T YOU EVER GO OUT TO THE MOVIES? The closest movie theatre is 25-30 miles away and I like my place and I'd rather spend my money on getting new fencing or expanding my Plant Rescue Facility [stuffed full of plants I've rescued from roadways and poorly cared for nursery facilities] [and some I've grown myself] BUT (insert my real name) THAT'S NOT HEALTHY YOU SHOULD BE GOING TO MOVIES AND OUT TO DINNER MORE OFTEN but if I went out to the movies and to dinner all the time, I wouldn't have a place in the country and I sure wouldn't be able to get anything fixed out here BUT BUT BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND DON'T YOU GET LONELY? why would I get lonely, I have lots to do and besides I see friends a few times a week [STUNNED SILENCE] YOU HAVE FRIENDS?????

Ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I mean, what do you do?

Is it any wonder I'm her only friend?

What do you do?

3 Comments:

At 9:10 AM, Blogger Leila M. said...

oh dear, I've had these before. Now, I'll be brutally honest.

There's two types of negative friends-- the fault finding, slightly jaded or cynical friends-- which are generally ok, and you only need a break from them occasionally.

And then there's the emotional vampires. If she's sucking the life out of you-- GET AWAY. This is a form of co-dependance- she's latching on to you because you're letting her. If you weren't there, she'd find another kind hearted, yet gullible soul, to do the same with. It's co-dependance, I'm telling you. I've had the life sucked out of me several times over the years-- and in the end, emotional cripples will expect one of two things from you-- to be their eternal yes-maam (ie listen, agree with them no matter how contradictory they're being-- and never actually criticse or be constructive) or to become their personal shrink/handyman (ie fix all my shit because I'm helpless and can't do it myself sort of thing)

It suckssssssssssssssssss.... and a good argument for caller ID.

not nice to say, but it's self preservation in the end.

 
At 9:44 AM, Blogger Roc Strongo said...

Roc would have to agree. People like that are no good for you, don't let your guilt about being her only friend cloud your eyes from the truth. Why do you think she doesn't have any other friends? Roc normally justs punches a person like that in the face(see Roc's blog), however, Roc would suggest you recommend to your friend that SHE be the one to go to movies or such and meet new people.

 
At 1:50 PM, Blogger Cookie said...

:=D

He. Thanks guys. I was really hoping someone would say KICK 'ER TO THE CURB!

Consider her kicked. :=D

 

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