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Tom Coburn is a Big Fat Jerk


Home of the Barking Moonbat


Friday, January 20, 2006

Bubba gets the job done

Now say what you will about the Bubbas. But when push comes to shove, they get the job done.

I wish I had hours to sit and write this and I know it won't make much sense, but between everything going on and teaching again and me becoming a reading addict once again, there just isn't the time.

But I have to blog the fire that almost ate my place and pay tribute to the Bubbas who saved the day.

Bear in mind, I just got off work and back home and am turning around and leaving again in a few minutes to run up to Tahlequah to meet some friends and eat shrimp --- cold boiled shrimp. Mmmm. Also bear in mind I can't quite figure out how I used to have the time to blog --- what happened? I mean, nothing's really changed. But I don't have a spare moment these days except to read whatever I can put my mitts on.

So here's what happened. Eye witness account, my eye witness account, taken from an email I sent shortly after the finally got all the power back on.

Monday night: Several hours ago, my power went off and back on and off again, which isn't completely unusual for out here. Then, I started hearing this crazy noise every time it started to kick back on, and I thought it was coming from the whole house surge protector I put on a while back. So I headed out to check and coincidentally heard tiny teenaged girl screaming from the herd of teenage girls who were running down the road to the top of the hill there.

I decided this deserved investigation. I also thought it meant my surge protectors were exploding.

I went outside and everything looked normal but I heard this tiny teenaged girl screaming from the top of the hill "it's there, it's there, it's in the corner!" then a big KABLOOOM again. So I walked up to where they were and just as I got there, I saw the transformer exploding!!!!! Which wouldn't be such a big deal except we're in a record breaking drought and a transformer exploding means one thing: fire!!!

So I said to the girls we have to call the fire department now but my phone got blown out when the electric went! So one of the girls (in between screaming) said I have a mobile phone! So I said call the fire dept! and she said I don't know the number!! so I said call 911!! and she really did say but I don't know the number! I mean, we were all kind of freaked out because that thing was exploding and sending off sparks maybe every 1-2 minutes.

So she called 911, then just like what happened when a big wind blew through and knocked my big hickory into the road thus causing the first traffic jam (9 whole cars) in the history of the community, pickup trucks started showing up everywhere filled with every manner of Bubba and every manner of possibly useful equipment.

The most entertaining aspect of it all was the guy across the road had to open his cattle gates because that's how emergency vehicles would have to gain access ---- and his cows were thrilled by the explosions and even happier to see open gates and he was herding them with this big old tractor. It was hilarious. You could practically see little cartoon bubbles over the cows' heads reading "FREE!! FREE AT LAST!! WE'RE BUSTING OUT OF HERE!!!"

In any case, sure enough, the ground caught fire before the volunteer fire department got here, and right across from my place!!!, so I went into my memorized emergency plan mode and loaded up the dogs and turned on the hose which is still running.

And the Bubbas went crazy when the fire started and started stomping on it and throwing dirt at it and one guy pulled out his chainsaw and was threatening the fire with it and the guy on the tractor had even worse problems on his hands because his cows were flatout stampeding and looking happy about it even --- I mean, they were frolicking!

And finally the volunteer fire department (the same one which burned down a couple years ago) showed up and it took them an hour but they got it out.

And this year, they're getting a gigantic donation from me.


Sunday, January 15, 2006

More things you learn when you're not blogging

If you're awoken at 2 in the morning by something that sounds like three teenagers attacking your mailbox --- especially if your mailbox has been the victim of three such attacks in the previous months --- don't say to yourself ah, it's just some bozo whose muffler's falling off and fall back to sleep because something sounding like three teenagers attacking your mailbox really does mean your mailbox is being attacked by three teenagers.